Lawn Force One

Like a machete through cold butter...

Lawn Force One

Hey Friends,

Good morning, expecially (sp?) to the people that signed up to become a Founder of The Lorem Ipsum.

This week, I bought a new-to-me lawn mower with the money I made from this publication. I've dubbed her Lawn Force One, AKA "The Beast".

She's a beauty. Smokes when you start her up. Cuts through weeds like a machete through cold butter, and she's not intimidated by the dog's leave-behinds.

Thank you for your support of The Lorem Ipsum and by extension, my fleet of lawn care vehicles.

I'm glad you signed up.

I'm not a good salesperson, because ultimately, everything I am producing is completely free. As a Forever Free member (that's probably you if you are getting this email) you get access to all free content from The Lorem Ipsum. As a Founder, the only thing you get access to that Forever Free members do not get is thoughts and prayers.

But that is changing. Slightly.

Next week, I am beginning the release of the first of The Lorem Ipsum Serials.

Serials are a deep dive into a topic across a series of articles. For now, this first Serial is going to be available to subscribers only (including Forever Free subscribers) so you have to log into the site to get access to the full article. At some undisclosed time in the future, Serials will be for paid members only. The Weekly will always be free, thus the name Forever Free.

Thanks for joining me.

Let's get to The News.

Hot Takes

Week 30 of 2022

  • Joe Manchin Has Struck a Deal. In a last-minute turnaround, it looks like Senator Joe Manchin is going to support a $369 billion package that targets climate issues and taxes. According to unconfirmed reports, even Manchin was surprised he supported it since he "generally doesn't support anything his party does."

    According to reality, climate change is costly, and spending $369 billion might be the cheap option compared to doing nothing. Here's an article I wrote on the topic almost a year ago.
  • Opening up some space. Currently, the only place Russia is not invading at the moment is Outer Space, since this week they said they are withdrawing from the International Space Station. The collaboration goes back decades but has been called into question since the Russians invaded Ukraine.
  • Working with monkeys. The latest craze in international disease is not the latest variant of coronavirus. Now Monkeypox is making news, and according to the World Health Organization, it's bananas. Their tip to prevent spreading it? Limit your sexual encounters only to your partner, because that's one of the ways it spreads. My sources say one of the bigger super spreaders may be Representative Matt Gaetz.
  • Standing for Trump and The Constitution. Steve Bannon was found guilty of two counts of contempt of court this week, a verdict that drew a smirk from him. Each count could come with between 30 days and a year in jail. Bannon is expected to be wearing two jumpsuits in jail, similar to his civilian attire, but prison guards are unlikely to let him have three pens clipped into his collar. In a speech outside the courthouse, Steve said he stood for "Trump and The Constitution" two things which are not possible to do at the same time.
  • That was some good peein'. This week, Prime Video announced that they remade the hit movie, A League of Their Own as a series, launching on August 12th. Evidently in the 2022 version, there actually is crying in baseball and a 45-minute therapy session available to the players.
  • Interest rates are up again. The Fed is doing everything it can to decrease in inflation which seems like just one thing. Raising interest rates. Well, this week they did it again, boosting rates by another 0.75%.
  • Leave it to Publicists. Leave it to Beaver star Tony Dow did not die this week on Tuesday, but then he did on Wednesday. Unfortunately, his publicist got the wrong day, releasing the news a day early. Tony did die as planned on Wednesday.

That's it for the news. Now here's The Gist.

It's Beer Thirty

The Gist

This week's article covers the outcome of the eight January 6th Committee Hearings. After the completion of the last hearing, here's what the Republicans are doing in response. I cover Representative Lauren Boebert's WWJD moments, and a look at whether Senator Josh Hawley is better as a track star or an H&M model.

Like A Beer in the Headlights
After the completion of the 8th January 6th Commission hearing, here’s what the Republicans are doing in response.

Next Week:

I've begun examining how generational change is changing America. Next week's article will launch our first Serial, available only to subscribers – both free and paid.

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Have a great weekend!