Activating The Queen's Gambit

Activating The Queen's Gambit

Hey Friends,

Welcome to another week of this penned magniloquent nourishment. Consider this email the baby formula of the news, except there doesn’t seem to be a shortage of news at the moment. At least not yet. But as far as The Lorem Ipsum goes, if the real thing is not your thing, or you’re allergic to it, just consider me your supply. I’ll be here every Friday morning to provide you with sustenance that is easy to digest, as long as supplies last.

Today I am writing from New York City, one of my favorite places in the world. This week, I’ve eaten at least one world class meal, one disappointing piece of New York style pizza, and I’ve been preached to on the Subway (as I understand it, the end is near, which is probably a relief for some).

Personally, I’m looking forward to the end of the midterm elections being near. I’ve been thinking about what platforms the two parties will be running on. I’ll get into that in a moment.

But first, here’s The News.

Hot Takes

Week 20 of 2022

The MidTerm Primaries took place in Pennsylvania, North Carolina, Oregon, Idaho and Kentucky this week.

For the Senate race in Pennsylvania, Doctor Mehemet Oz is facing margins as thin as the blade of a scalpel against David McCormick. It still remains to be seen who is making the cut.

In North Carolina, Madison Cawthorn will be wheeling himself out of Washington after being run over by Chuck Edwards.

Most candidates seem to be seeking Trump’s endorsement. As far as a potential bid for President from Donald Trump himself in 2 years, we still don’t know, but The Lorem Ipsum has been told that he is testing the slogan “Make America Impeach Me Again” or MAIMA.

In a Supermarket in Buffalo Payton S. Gendron went to pick up eggs and milk and kill ten innocent people. His massacre was an intentional act of white supremacy which he had been planning for quite some time.

Gendron won’t be on Tucker Carlson anytime soon, but his ideas, such as “Great Replacement Theory” have been promoted on the show.

Here are the names of the victims of this senseless act of violence.

On A Lighter Note, Elon Musk paused his plans to purchase Twitter last Friday. No one knows if the deal is going to come together after all. They just know this is a lighter note. Musk says he’s still committed to buying Twitter, but he says the bots are a problem.

The Defense Production Act has been invoked by President Biden to increase the supply of baby formula. Half of the people on Facebook have also worked toward a solution by saying “just breastfeed.”

Deadpan comedian Norm Macdonald, my biggest inspiration for the content of this newsletter, recorded a comedy special which will be released posthumously on Netflix.

Netflix subscribers have been dying off, so the company believes their remaining subscribers would like their comedy special stars to be dead too.

The Depp-Heard trial is in its final stretch, and on the subject, Chris Rock offered advice for us all regarding women who bring forth allegations of sexual assault. Chris said “Believe all women,… believe all women except Amber Heard.”

Amber is credited as starting the #MePoo movement.

That’s it for the news. Here’s The Gist.

The Queen's Midterm

The Gist

Not long ago, after bingeing the hit Netflix series The Queen’s Gambit, I picked up a new chess board. It appears I’m in good company, because sales of chess boards doubled a few months after the release of the show, demonstrating how much influence pop culture television can have on our society. Related, I’m still waiting to see if porn finally catches on after the HBO show Minx launched, featuring a feminist female magazine writer turned smut zine slinger filled with male nudes. We’ll keep our eyes on things, no pun intended.

Politics and Omelet Making

My draw to the game is because of the exercise in strategic thinking. I’m one that realizes that to make an omelet, you have to break some eggs, and to win a chess game you have to lose some pawns. Winning isn’t about getting your way. It’s about getting what you really want in the end, which is your opponent’s king, and a hearty breakfast to go with it.

That completes this week’s issue. Thank you for reading.

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As always, reply here anytime, and Have a great weekend!